How can I get my husband to be more proactive in our household i.e. taking the car for oil changes, trash day?

He seems to think that nothing is worth doing until it's a problem -which means he expects me to jump up and help him fix the problems he could've prevented. I hate doing ALL of the planning. (He may or may not make repairs in the house -IF he sees me make headway.) He says he has too much to think about. We don't have kids. We have one house, 3 vehicles. (Only the one I bought is in use.) What's there to think about? He was recently arrested (his car towed) and now he's due in court this month bc he didn't pay a year-old traffic ticket! Arggghhh! Now that car has $1600 in fines! Help.How can I get my husband to be more proactive in our household i.e. taking the car for oil changes, trash day?
First of all you should write down all the things in a new book just for him write down the dollar amount it cost the family.Then plan a day out just for the two of you,something he likes maybe a full body massage,out to dinner,or a day at the park.Spend some time with him let him have fun then after a few hours,tell him the reason why you brought him here is because of these problems,and open the book and CALMLY AND IN A LOW TONE VOICE NOT SCREAMING talk about the problems.If it happens again do it again and again,he will catch on, after a while.All men can be trained.How can I get my husband to be more proactive in our household i.e. taking the car for oil changes, trash day?
Sounds like you need to have a talk with him and tell him buddy you need to help around the house more. Maybe he doesn't realize that he is not helping out as much as he should. Sounds like he doesn't care..............Thank goodness you don't have kids, I think it would make things worse.
You teach people how to treat you. Most likely he continues to let things build up because he knows you will help. Let him know that this can not continue. A marriage should be equal. You both should be making mature decision that will help you build a home together. Tell him to think of the future. It sounds like you two need to have a heart to heart. Tell him what you want for the future. Since you are already married you need to make sure your on the same page.
Sorry to say, your husband is a loser. You could probably do a lot better, and you should divorce him now while there aren't any kids. You're probably better off alone, even. At least then you're not paying for his irresponsible behavior.





I'm not a fan of home improvement myself, and I'd rather hire it done, but I'm apparently the only one who cares about trash getting out in my household - so I do it 100% of the time.
Some men are just babies abd b/c you probably handled all of the household issues and family business in the past, you have enabled him to become lazy.





Let's not talk about the traffic issue...let's just say that my husband has your husband beat in that area...but he is awesome with household chores and stuff like that.





Put your foot down and simply stop doing the chores. Start cleaning up after yourself only!!! and tell him the old rules don't apply..you are his wife and not his mother!!!
I would reward him with sex. If youre not having sex, then the ';stuff on his mind'; is probably another woman. If you have no kids, get out now while you can. There are so many nice guys in this world, im sure you can do better.
Yes, I would create a sexual reward program for him. If he does something aroudn the house reward him!!!
A marriage take two people to make it work.It sounds like you are in this one alone.I will tell you what I keep telling my niece about her husband.If he isn't helping your situation he's hurting it.You shouldn't make things harder on yourself than they already are.You should find someone whom wants to be married and whom will appreciate having a woman in his life like you.
It sounds like a cattle prod might be a good tool for this job. A couple of good shocks from the old prod will snap his lazy a s s into action.
I hate to stand in judgement but your husband sounds LAZY. Has he no ambition ?? If he was thinking, he wouldn't be in the mess hes in right now. Arggghhh !


What's he good for?


I'll bet your having a few regrets. I wish I knew what to tell you. Sometimes a seperation for space to think yourself would be a good wakeup call for him and perhaps turn him around if he wants to save this marriage.


Be glad you have no children with him. You have a better choice.


Does he keep himself clean ?? If not, he could be a victim of depression. There is help for that !!


You be the judge !!! Good Luck to you %26amp; happy New Year !!
You have 2 choices...you can either hire someone to do the work and let your hubby pay for it with HIS money or you can go to a nearby sex shop and get a coupon book and everytime he does something that you like.....give him a coupon so that he can redeem it at any time he desires. You can always get them to do what you want with sex. That is my suggestions... HAVE FUN!!
my wife uses Hubby point to get what she wont's out of me . You see i can turn in the hubby Point For Sex an Night out with the boys. so i now have over 25 hubby points this year and i can what to turn them in.
Whatever problems he's created, let him handle it; DO NOT help him in any way. If the garbage needs taking out, put it in front of the door, so he has to trip over it going outside. If repairs need to be done in your house, pay someone else to do it, don't rely on him.





Be glad and thankful that you don't have children with this person, because they'd be just like him, or worse. If he needs a ride somewhere, don't give him one; tell him to use one of the other cars, or take the bus. Obviously, he's still acting like a child, wanting Mommy to take care of him; don't become a Mommy for this guy, because he will never grow up. Good luck.